Embracing My Sweatpants Era: A Season of Grace.
April 2024 Newsletter
But He said to me, “My grace is sufficient for you, for My power is made perfect in weakness. Therefore I will boast all the more gladly about my weaknesses, so that Christ’s power may rest on me.”
2 Corinthians 12:9 NIV (emphasis added)
Thoughts to Ponder
Fun fact: I have not really listened to Taylor Swift’s music since her album titled Red. I know, the horror. But I am culturally-aware enough to know that everyone is in an “era” based off some album or song of hers. Or maybe it’s just the name of her current tour? I’m not really sure.
I am firmly, without a doubt, in my Sweatpants Era. It’s actually more than just a Sweatpants Era—it’s a Likely-Covered-In-Spit-Up-Sweatpants-Era (but not enough spit up to where I need to wash them… Moms, you know what I mean).
Our son is somehow already seven weeks old, and I wish I wasn’t still living in sweatpants. I wish I was in a different Era.
I want to be the put-together mom. I want to be the mom that puts on real clothes that fit comfortably (ideally, my pre-baby clothes). I want my hair to be washed and not pulled up into a messy bun in the hopes of hiding how long it’s actually been since I washed it. I want to do all the things, go all the places, and have it all together. I want to be in my Supermom Era, a Thriving Mom Era, or something like that. I’d even take Mediocre Mom Era over Sweatpants-With-Dried-Spit-Up Era.
Instead, I’m mostly staying home, nursing and bouncing the baby, and sitting in my spit-up-covered sweatpants watching Encanto with our toddler for the tenth time this week.
We won’t talk about Bruno (an Encanto reference, for those of you who aren’t up to date on your Disney movies), but I do want to talk about grace.
I’ve known the verse listed above, 2 Corinthians 12:9, for what seems like forever, but I never really understood the depth of it, or felt the weight of it, until I became a mom.
When I first became a mom just over three years ago, I absolutely felt at my weakest—physically, mentally, and emotionally. As a physician assistant, I knew what was medically happening to my body, but to feel it was an entirely different story. I didn’t know I could be that exhausted, yet somehow still had to function enough to care for our newborn daughter.
As I rocked our daughter in the middle of the night, tears streaming down my face from sheer exhaustion, 2 Corinthians 12:9 kept coming to mind: "My grace is sufficient for you, for My power is made perfect in weakness.” I vividly remember praying at the time, I am so weak, that the only way through this is by Your power, not mine. Thank You for Your sustaining grace. Keep Your power and grace coming. I need it.
I clung to that verse as a lifeline during the early newborn days of both of our children. I still cling to it now, because there will never be a time where I don’t need His power, or His grace. Toddler energy levels plus nursing a newborn equals a level of tired that I have never felt before.
I will never be in a Supermom Era, as much as I might wish for it… But honestly, as I’ve wrestled with my Sweatpants-With-Dried-Spit-Up Era, I’ve realized I don’t want to be in a Supermom Era.
I want to be in a Sustaining Grace Era. And the good news is, I already am. Each day, each moment, that I turn my eyes upward instead of outward, I tap into His unrelenting power and His amazing grace. When I seek His will over my own, when I seek His ways over society’s pressures, I become filled with His peace that transcends all understanding.
His power, grace, and peace allows me to respond with patience instead of frustration. It gives me strength to get out of bed to nurse our son at 4am without resentment. It encourages me let go of comparing myself and my life to others, and helps me to find contentment with the season I’m in right now.
From the outside, I am absolutely in my Sweatpants Era… spit-up-covered and all. It’s not usually pretty, and it might even be a little bit smelly at times, to be brutally honest. But if you were to look a little closer, and dig a little deeper, the posture of my heart sings a different song. It sings that I’m in a Season of Grace—or as Taylor might say, a State of Grace. (See, I do know some Taylor Swift songs!)
Don’t get me wrong, it isn’t always easy. Some days and moments are definitely harder than others. Frustration can still seep in under the surface (another Encanto reference), tears still flow at times, and sometimes it takes more than just a few deep breaths combined with whole lot of prayer to push through until my husband gets home from work. But I do my best to choose His unending grace over my self-limiting grit each day, because no matter how hard I try, my strength will never match His. In fact, it’s in my weakness that allows His strength to shine through, and carry me when I hit my breaking point—and that, my friend, is Amazing, Sustaining Grace…The best era to be in.
What I’m Reading
I actually have a lot of time to read right now, mainly in the middle of the night during nursing sessions. I just finished a WWII trilogy, titled The Diplomat’s Wife by Chrystyna Lucyk-Berger. Overall I’d give the trilogy 3.5-4 stars.
My favorite book I read this last month was Code Name Helene by Ariel Lawhon. This is another WWII historical fiction book and I can easily give it 5 stars. The majority of the story is true, and the author does a fantastic job at the end explaining what is historically accurate. I highly recommend it!
I’m currently reading Now and Not Yet: Pressing in When You’re Waiting, Wanting, and Restless for More by Ruth Chou Simons. I was so excited when I found out this book was being released, and even more excited when my dad gifted it to me for my birthday! (Books, or gift cards to buy books, make fabulous gifts for the literary-lover in your life!) I’m not very far into yet, but I can tell it’s going to be a good one.
**I’m looking for other captivating books to read while I’m nursing, so please send any recommendations my way!**
What I’m Writing
I wrote this newsletter. :) I’m giving myself lots of grace during this newborn season. I’m working on some articles that I hope to submit for publication in the near future.
What I’m (Kind Of) Cooking
My cooking involves heating up whatever delicious meal was provided to us, either via our meal train or from the freezer meals that my mother-in-law made us.
A pro-tip: find an incredible babysitter who is also in a pastry class who surprises you with made-from-scratch macaroons! It is taking all of my will power to not eat them all before my husband gets home today.
For anyone wondering what a great gift is for a family who just welcomed a baby… Make them a meal. Seriously, make them a meal in a disposable container. The last thing on my mind right now is cooking, and I am forever grateful for everyone who’s provided us meals!
Let’s Connect!
Thanks for reading my newsletter! Feel free to send this along to anyone who might enjoy it. My hope is to encourage you in your everyday faith and to share the joys and trials of life and motherhood. We’re all in this together.
—Kristin
